I don’t believe in chewing on resentment and swallowing sadness so you can tell yourself you’re alright. I’ve done it. And it tastes sour. It’s not something that just goes away. It comes rushing back up your throat every time you see the person who hurt you. It’s a resonating discontentment that rushes through you, nibbles at your bones, tugs on your heartstrings, stirs acid in your stomach. It’s not worth the fight.

Someone hurt you, yes. You have every right to be upset. You have every right to pull your hair out and curse the heavens. But you also owe it to yourself to accept the truth. Saying “fuck you,” and not looking back doesn’t put you any closer to moving on. Life is life. Love is love. Love isn’t life and life isn’t love. I don’t know how you got that impression.

Life is a cacophony of beauty, breath, and emotion. There are moments when everything sounds like it’s finally in harmony. You sigh. You think to yourself: “This is why I’m alive.” To hear a brief melody that fills your soul to the brim making your fingertips tingle with warmth and fullness. Some of these moments will come from being in love. It’s true. Love is one of the greatest things about being human. But it’s not the only great thing.

Fill yourself with doubt, self-consciousness, jealousy, and hatred, and you’ll miss out on all the beauty left around for you to see, touch, and hear. Don’t drown in your anger. Cling to the good and appreciate what the bad taught you. Embrace everything, and choose to be joyful despite what the world throws at you. Appreciate all the feelings you felt in those hellish moments. Those moments where you felt yourself slipping off the edge and your heart collapsing in on itself.

Because that’s what it really means to be alive.